Hate

I miss being happy, I miss our home, I miss getting excited to see you after work, I miss your smile, I miss how you looked at me, I miss your hands and the way they touched me, I miss making you laugh, I miss falling asleep with you, I miss waking up with you, I miss cuddles and movies,  I miss our couch, I miss our bed, I miss our dishes. I miss being happy. I feel like my body is breaking all the time. I don't want to live without you. I wish I told you when I struggled, I wish I asked for your help, I wish you could forgive me, I wish we could start over and do better because we learned. I miss you, I love you.